Chilling information

Well today was eventful in the sense that I sucked up my gut and walked into a veterinary clinic that near the restaurant that I was eating at for lunch (I actually had no clue there was a vet clinic there!) and asked if there were any volunteering positions. Surprise, surprise, there actually was. They didn’t have any available at the moment, but they said to send in my resume and  I just did and I hope I’m not jinxing this so I won’t say anymore.

Now that exams are over and I have a long weekend I can finally start to read again! I have this odd habit/superstition that I can’t read anything before a test or exam because then I won’t be able to remember things properly and I’ll be distracted by wanting to read. And since they’re all over I’ve picked up the long lost books! Amazing. I really have missed reading and I’ve been making excuses for not reading and I really need to stop because books are a portal. A portal that at the most will be $30 or even free if I borrow it from the library. I recently read Venom by Fiona Paul and I have recommend this to everyone. It was a fantastic book that was full of romance, mystery and action. I loved each character and was on my toes guessing who the criminal was (though, of course, no one can write better mystery books and have you guessing than Agatha Christie!).

I was actually discussing this with my mom while washing dishes today and I loved bonding over a great topic such as books and the way we read them. Who can deny that books bring you to different periods of times all over the world. Maybe even in a different world. Perhaps I’m the only one, but I get a shiver down my spine whenever I finish reading an amazing book and it really speaks to me. It’s like once I’ve read the last word, the final closing statement that has concluded the book and close the actual book cover  I get a chill that makes me relish reading. I think it’s because I feel so completed. Take Catcher in the Rye. I closed that book cover and bam! the chill just ran down my spine because I felt like I got a better sense of Holden and I had just gone through this journey with him –saw all his ups and downs– and it’s ending. It’s finished. He’s working on getting better and ah! It’s just a fantastic feeling that I wish I could bottle up in a perfume and spray it on me every day to keep me smiling.

The power of the written word is just that: powerful. I don’t think we even realize how much power it holds over us nowadays. A few simple words or a whole novel of words can inspire a person and put them on a completely separate path that they were on before. You can change someone’s opinion on a subject, feed them information that they can elaborate on something and even inspire them to start a whole company based on an idea sparked by just a few words. It’s honestly crazy. I completely believe in J.K. Rowling’s words that if you don’t like to read then you haven’t found the right book yet.

You know what else inspires people? Music. I feel like music is a huge part of my life that I haven’t really recognized. Music changes my mood, it helps me get into daydream mode and it lifts my spirits. And have you ever noticed the music in movies? It practically makes or breaks the movie and really sets the mood/atmosphere. I’m sure that the one scene wouldn’t be as intense if it wasn’t for the background music that we barely notice. Take in the season finale of Gossip Girl (yes I realize I’m all about Gossip Girl right now, forgive me). Florence Welch’s voice comes out in ‘You’ve Got the Love’ and whenever I listen to it, it gives me chills. And once it ends I feel like I’m waiting for The Pretty Reckless’ Kill Me (is that the song?) to start up and hear Gossip Girl’s mysterious voice finish the awesome ending.

I think I’m going to finish knitting my best friend her headband that I promised her while watching the Avengers and possibly sneaking in chapters of Neal Shusterman’s Unwholly (P.S. you should all check out his first book to the series, Unwind, because it was honestly magnificent).

Sewing my thoughts together

I don’t know at what age you start wearing heels. When is it? 18? 20? 24? If someone knows this, please let me know, because I can’t wait for the time when I can start wearing heels and buy shoes and just basically buy the clothing that I really want to wear. I want to be able to wear dresses almost like daily and not be judged by people surrounding me on why I constantly wear dresses when they’re in jeans or leggings. Really, I do believe that gossip girl has inspired me. I sometimes forget at how beautiful the clothes that they wear are and I wish I could afford or pull off one of the looks that they do. I mean there are dresses that look so unappealing when they’re on the hanger and then the person wears them and voila! It’s been changed to an astonishing dress or outfit that makes me want to wear it (great advertising, huh? But I would never be able to pull of an outfit as well as them).

And thing about confidence that I’ve noticed is that I feel a lot better and more social and all that when I’m wearing an outfit that I like and feel great in. I think that fashion and clothing really has an effect on the way you act. It can really change your mood and everything and I love that about it. It’s just something that I’d love to pursue.

I really need to learn how to sew. I mean, I picked up knitting and now I can knit myself a headband and a bow and scarf, but I want to be able to sew fabric together to make an outfit. It is my plan this year to learn how to sew, yup. That is my new years resolution as of  today because I really want to get my fashion sense and style going, because all I seem to be doing is following the trends of the people around me.

Done exams! I had my last one today and I feel so relaxed now because I’ve got nothing to worry about. I can read whatever I want, draw, knit, do basically whatever without worrying about the next exam. Unfortunately because of the snow day I had my exam today instead of on Monday, which was kind of horrible, but whatever. It’s over and done with and I cannot be happier.

Gossiping on the couch

2/3 exams finished! My last one, which is science, is tomorrow which I should really be studying for, but I have the oddest technique. I can only study at night, the hours right before I go to bed and then once I’m done I have to sleep right away. No reading books, no watching tv, no going on the internet. I might text people for a bit before I turn off the lights, but otherwise I can’t do anything else. Right after my french exam today all I’ve done is go online, tried to write, knit and drawn some pictures while I’ve been watching nonstop episodes of Gossip Girl, season 1.

I’ve got this weird mind where when I think at home it builds up my confidence and then when I get to school and in public I completely forget about my advice to myself. I’m just realizing (well not just that I could be so much more outgoing and all that with people if I just didn’t care. If I didn’t care what people thought of me. But that’s so hard to remember and that’s a huge problem. I mean, I keep reminding myself that I’m most likely never going to encounter these people in high school ever again. There’s a chance, yes, but not extremely likely. God, and I’m being a horrible person because I want to make new friends because some of the friends I have aren’t exactly fun to hang out with. And my best friend has friends and a boyfriend who she hangs out with all the time and she always takes me along with them, but it’s not the same because I don’t know them as well as she does. Then again, it was because of her that I met my other extremely good friend, so maybe that will happen again.

Really times are so stressful right now when they shouldn’t be. Oh, and I really want to get a job. I already have one, but I only work once a week and I’d love to get another one because I’m short on money (kind of). And I want to be busier. I had this one day during the break where I was constantly doing something. There was never any time when I wasn’t doing something and now I understand my best friend. She always has to be doing something. She hates having no plans or not doing anything and she always has to be hanging out with someone or just a packed schedule to say the least. And then that one day I completely realized how she felt. I was at her house actually the day before and I slept over at her house. That packed day I left her house around noon and went hiking in the woods with my mom, brother, aunt and uncle for a while. Got back, ate and drank some tea while discussing books I believe. After we went swimming (great exercising this whole day, yes!) and had dinner after. Baking an apple pie was next up after eating dinner (which, btw, was my favourite kind of fish) and then we watched my favourite movie, Super 8 and went to bed well after midnight. Usually I come home and spend the day doing mindless things. Mostly wasting it on the internet, tumblr and facebook will honestly make me fat and unhealthy. It’s not healthy! And I’d like to stop it and do something useful. I mean, knitting took a bit of the useless out of my hobbies, however I knit in front of the tv, so that kind of backfires.

Oh and since I am watching Gossip Girl while I am writing this I’m getting a huge urge to do fashion. Love fashion and I would totally get into the industry (and the art industry), but I’m not extremely creative and basically, I copy things. Oh another reason for me wanting to get a job. To get enough money to actually shop.